I have to confess, I surely did enjoy my years as a news reporter. Excitement, comedy, tragedy, drama -- and that was just the Modoc town board opening bids for trash removal. All to be boiled down for a story in the next day's Winchester New Gazette, which was still a daily back then.
One of the reporters from the "big city" paper, the Muncie Star, befriended me and shared some tips and tricks for news writing.
She and later editors all talked about how "said" is invisible to the reader. Not only do we skim right over it, but it's neutral unlike other attributions. But I liked action words like "snorted" and "chortled," "thundered," "alleged," "snarled" and a whole lot of others that I thought really jazzed up my stories.
No one but me liked my lively style. Some editors cringed and some cussed but they all agreed that "said" was about all that needed to be said. Neutral and invisible.
If we fast forward a few years, past the Peru Daily Tribune and The Farmer's Exchange, I almost feel like I am learning how to write all over again since I am working on fiction.
Sometimes we don't even need an attribution. I have been trying to use action beats instead, as long as it's clear what's going on.
I could write, Larry the city editor snarled, "What is this stuff? Were you on drugs when you wrote this?"
Or I could say, Larry threw down his blue pencil and ran his hands through his sparse hair, clenching his fists with tufts of dishwater blond poking out. He glared at the cub reporter. "What is this stuff? Were you on drugs when you wrote this?" He lurched his swivel chair across the aisle to Mary Jo, who was just lighting up a Camel. "I need a whiff of that, MJ. Just some side-stream ... now's a really bad time to quit smoking."
As I wrote this, I thought it was about attributions. But, looking back, maybe it's also about mentoring less experienced writers as well. Later on I appreciated all of my editors' time and input and friendship. I think that's one of our strengths as a group, something I have appreciated.
Friday, April 16, 2010
Thursday, April 15, 2010
If I Were A Butterfly… Or Was I?
Mary Allen dared to bring you comma rules. I dare to bring you the grammar of subjunctive mood. Yeah, blame it on her for opening the door. And no fair running away! You claim to be a writer? Then you read this and grow as a writer. C’mon, raise your right hand and repeat after me, “I will read every word of this blog, even if I don’t understand it.“
Thank you.
I learned about subjunctive mood in Spanish class. I never heard it mentioned in any English classes (and I was an English major), so if it’s new to you, don’t worry. The point is we all misuse it, and as writers we need to master it.
A verb mood is different from a verb tense. Tense demonstrates time (thus we have present tense, past tense, future tense, etc.), whereas mood indicates a state of reality (or lack thereof). I won’t confuse you by bringing up all the other moods—today is about the subjunctive mood and we don’t give a hoot about the others.
Simply stated, the subjunctive mood deals with a state contrary to reality—such as a wish or a hypothetical what-if situation. So if you wanted to be a butterfly, you wouldn’t say “If I was a butterfly” or “If she was a butterfly.” No, no, no! The fact, the reality, is that you are not a butterfly, so you use the subjunctive. The correct way to say this is “If I were a butterfly” or “If she were a butterfly.”
Hang on, you said you’d read this all the way through. Didn’t you? *whine* Okay, look for the big clue word IF. The subjunctive is most commonly used in connection with that little two-letter word, so begin with it. If, if, if. Got it? If the word if denotes something is hypothetical and it ain’t reality, then use the subjunctive verb WERE. So… If, if, if plus were, were, were. Simple, huh? If I were a rich man (reality is I’m not), I’d pay off the national debt. If he were to find the clue (as of yet it’s not a reality), he’d be a hero. If Chris were a girl (no way), he’d be afraid of spiders. If I were to wear a mini skirt (Ha! Me?), I’d never stop blushing.
But…
If I was a rich man (I am), I had to have an heir. If he was to find the clue (somebody set it up so he couldn’t miss it), I was in trouble. If Chris was a girl (the possibility exists), I’d better give her a private room. If I was to wear a mini skirt (I’m obliged), I had to buy it today.
Uh, yeah, let’s end the lesson there Other uses of the subjunctive mood exist, but your editor probably doesn’t know them, and that’s what they hire proofreaders for. But I’m not letting you off the hook. As a writer, you CAN, you MUST, conquer if, if, if plus were, were, were when the context of the sentence is a lack of reality.
You know, if I were a fairy, I’d wave my magic wand and you’d get it. But guess what?
Steph PrichardWednesday, April 14, 2010
First Lines: What the Wind Picked Up
This week on my own blog we've talked about openings to your novel and how even the first line can set tone, mood, hooking the reader into buying your book. Just go to Amazon.com and you can find books for sale there where they allow you to read the first chapter for free.(And sometimes authors themselves offer the free chapter on their websites and on guest blogs.) That's smart marketing.
If you fail to capture your reader in that first chapter, then no sale. Your first reader will be that editor (or his assistant,) so it better hook fast. All beginning and experienced authors understand this. And all fight to get that hooking first line into fertile waters for a big reel-in.
We could argue that many people so spend much time on the first three chapters, they then forget to polish up the rest of the story. True that. It happens. But unless your first lines hook, well, end of the story, anyway.
A few years ago a bunch of writers who call themselves ChiLibris decided to write a collection of stories to demonstrate how different writers can take a single idea and weave just as many unique stories. But they also show another concept in these stories and that is how they can take a single line, "The wind was picking up," and go from there hooking readers with their second line, and the first paragraph.They may all start with the same first line, but how did they each make that line his own?
Here's a sampling from that book from authors you may be familiar with (and who invariably kept in their own brand and voice.)
(What the Wind Picked Up: Proof That a Single Idea Can Launch a Thousands Stories from the Novelists of ChiLibris, iUniverse, ISBN 0-595-34113-6. $13.95.)
Each story starts with the same line, "The wind was picking up."
1. "Dog huddled closer to the building, shivering, empty belly aching. The concrete surface offered little shelter from the biting wind." (Burl's Gift by Karen Ball.)
2. "Garth Himmelfarb headed right into it. This was his first night out on a new exercise regimen--brisk walk around the mall, then home--but he was already feeling fatigue." (Hero by James Scott Bell)
3. "We were in the mouth of the Severn River, sailing east toward the Chesapeake Bay at a frightening speed, tilted to the right at a twenty-degree angle. I loosened the the dinghy's mainsheet, but the little sailboat continued to dig its leeward rail into the water." (The Dubious Dinghy by Ron and Janet Benrey)
4. "Judge Hiram T. Young leaned toward the diminutive woman in the witness stand. 'You shot your husband because the wind was picking up?'" (Reinventing Love by Stephen Bly)
5. "Or so it seemed. Palms swayed gently in the virtual breeze. Simulated waves washed upon silicon sand, cut by Higgins' landing craft and the Japanese battleship Hiei. Overhead, Zeroes tangled with Corsairs, while 'Val' dive bombers rained 500-pound death on U.S. troops diving for dubious coved of the bamboo huts of Guadalcanal." (Cyberspace Savior by Jefferson Scott)
This is a great exercise. Choose one of the genres above (or your favorite genre) and craft an opening starting with "The wind was picking up." Note above how the author created mood, pace, even genre in just a line or two. Think about themes, and how each author expresses so much in just their first paragraph.
Don't be afraid to share your first lines here in this exercise. What would YOU do if you were given an assignment like this? These were short stories, but the same thing happens with a long story, too--even nonfiction pieces must have that lead, that hook, that opening line which pulls you to read the next paragraph, sink $14.99-$29.95 into yet another book, turn the page even though you're supposed to be meeting with your honey at that restaurant.
At the end of this book the authors gave advice on maintaining a writing career and a valuable lesson learned. The price of the book is worth that. If you do pick up this book (and I think it's still for sale,) or you already have it, try jotting some notes on each story, underlining elements of each story, circling genre word choices, and make note of the themes.
So is anyone willing to share how he would write an opening using the first sentence, "The wind was picking up," ??? I'd love to see what you'd do.
Bonus: What genre would you write it in?
If you fail to capture your reader in that first chapter, then no sale. Your first reader will be that editor (or his assistant,) so it better hook fast. All beginning and experienced authors understand this. And all fight to get that hooking first line into fertile waters for a big reel-in.
We could argue that many people so spend much time on the first three chapters, they then forget to polish up the rest of the story. True that. It happens. But unless your first lines hook, well, end of the story, anyway.
A few years ago a bunch of writers who call themselves ChiLibris decided to write a collection of stories to demonstrate how different writers can take a single idea and weave just as many unique stories. But they also show another concept in these stories and that is how they can take a single line, "The wind was picking up," and go from there hooking readers with their second line, and the first paragraph.They may all start with the same first line, but how did they each make that line his own?
Here's a sampling from that book from authors you may be familiar with (and who invariably kept in their own brand and voice.)
(What the Wind Picked Up: Proof That a Single Idea Can Launch a Thousands Stories from the Novelists of ChiLibris, iUniverse, ISBN 0-595-34113-6. $13.95.)
Each story starts with the same line, "The wind was picking up."
1. "Dog huddled closer to the building, shivering, empty belly aching. The concrete surface offered little shelter from the biting wind." (Burl's Gift by Karen Ball.)
2. "Garth Himmelfarb headed right into it. This was his first night out on a new exercise regimen--brisk walk around the mall, then home--but he was already feeling fatigue." (Hero by James Scott Bell)
3. "We were in the mouth of the Severn River, sailing east toward the Chesapeake Bay at a frightening speed, tilted to the right at a twenty-degree angle. I loosened the the dinghy's mainsheet, but the little sailboat continued to dig its leeward rail into the water." (The Dubious Dinghy by Ron and Janet Benrey)
4. "Judge Hiram T. Young leaned toward the diminutive woman in the witness stand. 'You shot your husband because the wind was picking up?'" (Reinventing Love by Stephen Bly)
5. "Or so it seemed. Palms swayed gently in the virtual breeze. Simulated waves washed upon silicon sand, cut by Higgins' landing craft and the Japanese battleship Hiei. Overhead, Zeroes tangled with Corsairs, while 'Val' dive bombers rained 500-pound death on U.S. troops diving for dubious coved of the bamboo huts of Guadalcanal." (Cyberspace Savior by Jefferson Scott)
This is a great exercise. Choose one of the genres above (or your favorite genre) and craft an opening starting with "The wind was picking up." Note above how the author created mood, pace, even genre in just a line or two. Think about themes, and how each author expresses so much in just their first paragraph.
Don't be afraid to share your first lines here in this exercise. What would YOU do if you were given an assignment like this? These were short stories, but the same thing happens with a long story, too--even nonfiction pieces must have that lead, that hook, that opening line which pulls you to read the next paragraph, sink $14.99-$29.95 into yet another book, turn the page even though you're supposed to be meeting with your honey at that restaurant.
At the end of this book the authors gave advice on maintaining a writing career and a valuable lesson learned. The price of the book is worth that. If you do pick up this book (and I think it's still for sale,) or you already have it, try jotting some notes on each story, underlining elements of each story, circling genre word choices, and make note of the themes.
So is anyone willing to share how he would write an opening using the first sentence, "The wind was picking up," ??? I'd love to see what you'd do.
Bonus: What genre would you write it in?
Saturday, April 10, 2010
“Be” Careful What You Wish For…
Wouldn’t you love to have a dollar for every time you say you’re a writer, and someone pipes up with, “Oh, that’s so cool. I want to be a writer, too”?
Now, at this point, it’s nothing but a tribute to our sheer Christian charity (or patience, or naïveté—take your pick) that most of us actually play the game that follows. Smiling sweetly, we ask the question to which we probably already know the answer.
“And what are you writing?”
You know what comes next. A stammer, a blush, and a shuffling of feet (figuratively, if not literally). Then, the shy admission, “Well, I haven’t actually written anything yet. But I’ve got this great idea, and someday—!”
Uh-yup.
Reflexively, you’re probably nodding, because we all know this wannabe is making two key mistakes. First is, of course, relegating anything in your life to “someday.” We all know that day never comes. Second, also obvious, is that to be a writer, you need to write something.
I know, I know. Crazy, but there it is. Go figure.
However, just as the wannabe fools herself into thinking that just having a great idea makes her somehow “creative,” some of us fall into a similar trap in the writing life. Many of us, myself included, have encountered openings for paying gigs (!) in the writing biz and thought, “Wow, that’s something I’d love to be.”
Only when we start actually doing the job…we don’t like it at all.
How does this happen?
I call it the Bright Shiny Object syndrome. Bright Shiny Objects are everywhere; they’re gigs with great-sounding titles or trappings—but the actual essence of them isn’t bright or shiny. It’s just plain work, sometimes work that—at its heart—is something we actively dislike. And every Bright Shiny Object in writing has them.
Being a columnist is “cool”—struggling with relentless deadlines, not so much.
Being an editor is “cool”—having really awful writing to fix, when you didn’t buy it in the first place, not so much.
Being a consultant or freelancer is “cool”—having a client stiff you for payment, not so much.
A friend of mine is fond of saying, “Anything you think you want, remember—if you get it, you also get What Comes With It.” Many of us have discovered this to our chagrin; that while we like certain parts of the writing life, certain elements make us cringe.
But it’s doing those things—the stuff that Comes With It—that separates the wannabes from the real deal. A success guru once said, “The only difference between those who succeed and those who fail is that successful people do what unsuccessful people aren’t willing to do.”
In other words, successful people do What Comes With It. They take the grunt work with the glory...the Brussels sprouts as well as the chocolate pie.
So if this writing life isn’t sometimes all it was cracked up to “be” in your mind—if you’re dealing with nagging irritations, blocks, or other obstacles that get in the way of your bliss—you might need to do some honest assessment of what you thought you were getting into. Were there things involved in this career that you didn’t know about before you started writing? Or did you know about them but thought you could get away without doing them—or that someone else could be persuaded to do them for you?
(Bet you’ve found out the hard way about that one.*:-})
The bottom line is, no matter which step is your next one in this writing life—be careful what you ask for, or what you think you want. Try to learn all that Comes With It before you leap into any opportunity, no matter how much you “think” you already know about it. Nothing’s worse than grabbing for a Bright Shiny Object, only to discover too late that it’s actually a ball and chain in disguise.
Thoughts?
Janny
(Janet W. Butler)
*Except for the Brussels sprouts. I actually love them, so you can pass them on.
Now, at this point, it’s nothing but a tribute to our sheer Christian charity (or patience, or naïveté—take your pick) that most of us actually play the game that follows. Smiling sweetly, we ask the question to which we probably already know the answer.
“And what are you writing?”
You know what comes next. A stammer, a blush, and a shuffling of feet (figuratively, if not literally). Then, the shy admission, “Well, I haven’t actually written anything yet. But I’ve got this great idea, and someday—!”
Uh-yup.
Reflexively, you’re probably nodding, because we all know this wannabe is making two key mistakes. First is, of course, relegating anything in your life to “someday.” We all know that day never comes. Second, also obvious, is that to be a writer, you need to write something.
I know, I know. Crazy, but there it is. Go figure.
However, just as the wannabe fools herself into thinking that just having a great idea makes her somehow “creative,” some of us fall into a similar trap in the writing life. Many of us, myself included, have encountered openings for paying gigs (!) in the writing biz and thought, “Wow, that’s something I’d love to be.”
Only when we start actually doing the job…we don’t like it at all.
How does this happen?
I call it the Bright Shiny Object syndrome. Bright Shiny Objects are everywhere; they’re gigs with great-sounding titles or trappings—but the actual essence of them isn’t bright or shiny. It’s just plain work, sometimes work that—at its heart—is something we actively dislike. And every Bright Shiny Object in writing has them.
Being a columnist is “cool”—struggling with relentless deadlines, not so much.
Being an editor is “cool”—having really awful writing to fix, when you didn’t buy it in the first place, not so much.
Being a consultant or freelancer is “cool”—having a client stiff you for payment, not so much.
A friend of mine is fond of saying, “Anything you think you want, remember—if you get it, you also get What Comes With It.” Many of us have discovered this to our chagrin; that while we like certain parts of the writing life, certain elements make us cringe.
But it’s doing those things—the stuff that Comes With It—that separates the wannabes from the real deal. A success guru once said, “The only difference between those who succeed and those who fail is that successful people do what unsuccessful people aren’t willing to do.”
In other words, successful people do What Comes With It. They take the grunt work with the glory...the Brussels sprouts as well as the chocolate pie.
So if this writing life isn’t sometimes all it was cracked up to “be” in your mind—if you’re dealing with nagging irritations, blocks, or other obstacles that get in the way of your bliss—you might need to do some honest assessment of what you thought you were getting into. Were there things involved in this career that you didn’t know about before you started writing? Or did you know about them but thought you could get away without doing them—or that someone else could be persuaded to do them for you?
(Bet you’ve found out the hard way about that one.*:-})
The bottom line is, no matter which step is your next one in this writing life—be careful what you ask for, or what you think you want. Try to learn all that Comes With It before you leap into any opportunity, no matter how much you “think” you already know about it. Nothing’s worse than grabbing for a Bright Shiny Object, only to discover too late that it’s actually a ball and chain in disguise.
Thoughts?
Janny
(Janet W. Butler)
*Except for the Brussels sprouts. I actually love them, so you can pass them on.
Friday, April 9, 2010
Seven Habits of a Successful Christian Writer: Part II
If you missed Part I of my Seven Habits of a Successful Christian Writer, first published in Writing So Heaven Will Be Different, please scroll down to March 12 for the first four habits. In quick review, they are:
1. Use your gift of writing to worship God.
2. Enjoy the writing adventure (and its surprises).
3. Keep learning from the pros.
4. When disappointment happens, press on (like Paul).
5. Be open to publishing options you may not have prevously considered. Traditional large publishers aren't your only choice. I learned about self-publishing at a writers conference, and have found it a viable option for me (so far). I'm still working towards my goal of signing a contract with a traditional publisher. But meanwhile, I've sold several thousand of my self-published books (mostly when I speak about the topics of my books), enough to establish my own little company, Millie's Books.
6. Find a good agent. In today's publishing climate, most book manuscripts need the backing of a literary agency. In publishing, here's the irony: To get a good publisher, you need a good agency behind you; and to get a good agent, you need a good publisher who wants your book/s. I'm delighted to be represented by Diana Flegal of Hartline Literary Agency. I made my first contact with them at a writers conference. (Free grammar note: "Writers" does not need an apostrophe when it precedes "conference" because "conference" is for the writers, not owned by them.)
7. Be prayerfully assertive. Good manuscripts and books need good promotion. I've learned so much about promotion and marketing at writers conferences. (I didn't say I've put all I've learned into practice yet, far from it!) For example, I've learned the fun of exchanging business cards, and the importance of having a website and a blog and being on Face Book. But most of all, I've learned to be grateful for the doors God opens for me with little or no effort on my part.
As I've worked on these habits (and others), I've paraphrased my life verse for specific writing and publishing encouragement: And we writers know that God works in all things for the good of the writers who love God, and who live according to God's purpose (Romans 8:28).
Writing blessings,
Millie Samuelson
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